“What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver: A Critique

Introduction: “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver

“What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver was first published in his 1981 short story collection of the same name. This influential work solidified Carver’s reputation as a master of minimalist fiction. His style is characterized by unadorned prose that nonetheless resonates with deep emotional impact. Carver’s stories focus on the minutiae of everyday life, exposing the profound complexities of human connection and the elusive nature of love. His characters often wrestle with personal challenges and unfulfilled yearnings, their conversations revealing the subtle interplay of humor, vulnerability, and unspoken truths.

Main Events: “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver !

Literary Devices: “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver

Literary/Narrative Device	Quotation	Definition
Allusion	“If I could come back again in a different life, a different time and all, you know what? I’d like to come back as a knight.”	Reference to knights and armor, implying a desire for protection or safety.
Characterization	“Mel McGinnis is a cardiologist, and sometimes that gives him the right.”	Description or portrayal of characters’ personalities, traits, and motivations.
Dialogue	“How does that sound?” “Sounds fine to me.” “Eat or not eat. Or keep drinking. I could head right on out into the sunset.”	Conversations between characters revealing their thoughts, emotions, and relationships.
Flashback	“Then Terri said, ‘He beat me up one night. He dragged me around the living room by my ankles.'”	Recounting of past events, particularly Terri’s experience with her ex-lover.
Foreshadowing	“Mel’s discussion about the old couple involved in a car wreck hints at themes of love and mortality.”	Hinting at future events or themes, such as the exploration of love and mortality in the story.
Imagery	“Sunlight filled the kitchen from the big window behind the sink.”	Vivid descriptions that create mental images, such as the sunlight filling the kitchen.
Irony	“Terri’s comment about Mel always having love on his mind juxtaposed with their discussion on the complexities of love.”	Contrast between what is expected and what actually happens, highlighting the complexity of love.
Metaphor	“Love is compared to being on a honeymoon and to physical and sentimental aspects.”	Figurative comparison between two unlike things, such as comparing love to a honeymoon.
Motif	“Love is a recurring theme throughout the story.”	A recurring element or idea, in this case, love, which appears repeatedly throughout the narrative.
Parallelism	“Comparisons between the old couple in the car wreck and the main characters’ relationships.”	Similarities drawn between two or more elements, in this case, the experiences of different couples.
Personification	“The sunlight in the kitchen is described as a presence.”	Giving human qualities or characteristics to non-human entities, such as the sunlight being described as a presence.
Repetition	“Terri repeats her assertion that Ed loved her, emphasizing her belief in his love.”	Repeating words or phrases for emphasis, such as Terri emphasizing her belief in Ed’s love.
Satire	“Mel’s sarcastic remarks about marriage and his ex-wife.”	Use of humor, irony, or ridicule to criticize aspects of society or human behavior, such as Mel’s remarks about marriage.
Setting	“The story takes place in Mel’s kitchen, providing a backdrop for the characters’ conversations.”	The time and place in which a story occurs, setting the stage for the narrative and influencing the characters’ actions.
Symbolism	“The gin symbolizes the characters’ emotions and the progression of the discussion.”	The use of symbols to represent ideas or concepts beyond their literal meaning, such as gin representing emotions and discourse.
Theme	“The story explores themes of love, mortality, and the complexities of human relationships.”	Central ideas or messages explored in a literary work, such as love, mortality, and complex relationships in this story.
Tone	“The tone shifts between serious discussions and lighthearted banter, reflecting the characters’ emotions.”	The author’s attitude or perspective toward the subject matter, conveyed through the language and style of the narrative.
Understatement	“Mel’s casual remark about the old couple’s injuries belies the severity of their situation.”	Deliberate representation of something as less important or serious than it actually is, such as downplaying the couple’s injuries.
Verbal Irony	“Mel’s toast to ‘true love’ contrasts with the complex relationships discussed in the story.”	A contrast between what is said and what is meant, such as Mel’s toast to true love despite the discussion on complex relationships.
Wit	“Terri’s humor and banter with Mel add levity to the conversation.”	Clever and humorous remarks or dialogue that add entertainment or amusement to the narrative.

Characterization: “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver

Main Characters

• Mel McGinnis: A cardiologist and Terri’s husband. Mel is the most vocal of the group, dominating the conversation. His initial pronouncements on love sound knowledgeable and confident, but reveal themselves as increasingly confused and self-contradictory. He embodies the struggle to articulate what love truly means despite a veneer of knowledge about the physical heart.
• Terri: Mel’s wife. Terri offers a more pragmatic, darker view of love. Her central story revolves around Ed, an abusive ex-boyfriend. Despite the violence Ed inflicted, Terri sees his actions as a form of true love. Her understanding underscores the potential for self-destructive misinterpretations of the concept.
• Nick: The narrator. Nick is mostly an observer, but he offers insights and questions the others’ perspectives. He seems more reflective and less certain than the others, hinting that his own views on love are in flux.
• Laura: Nick’s wife. Laura is the least developed of the characters, but her occasional interjections and side conversations with Nick provide a balance against the intensity of Mel and Terri’s views.

Key Points About Characterization

• Ambiguity: Carver’s characters lack clear definitions. They are presented through dialogue and limited actions. There’s no inner monologue to unpack their motivations, leaving the reader to form interpretations.
• Minimalism: Carver’s signature style appears in the characterization too. There are no lengthy descriptions or backstories. We learn about the characters primarily through what they say and do in the limited time frame of the story.
• Contrasting Views on Love: Each character presents a distinct philosophy of love. Mel vacillates between grand ideals and cynicism. Terri embraces a harmful attachment to a twisted idea of love. Nick and Laura seem less assertive but likely question the extremes presented to them.

Thematic Implications of Characters

• The Difficulty of Defining Love: The characters’ struggle to understand and clearly articulate love mirrors the reader’s own experience. The story forces us to confront the slippery nature of love, and that there’s no single, satisfying definition.
• The Gap Between Ideal and Reality: The characters grapple with the disconnect between their idealized notions of love and the messier, more troubling reality of lived experiences.
• Subjectivity in Relationships: Each character defines love according to their personal experiences, highlighting the individual nature of romantic attachment and understanding.

Major Themes: “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver

1. The Ambiguity of Love: Carver’s core theme is that a single, clear definition of love remains elusive. Mel, despite his self-proclaimed expertise as a cardiologist, stumbles and revises his views on love throughout the story. Terri believes her abusive relationship with Ed was based on a twisted form of love. Meanwhile, Nick and Laura’s young love seems less certain when contrasted with the others. This lack of clear definition reflects the complex, shifting concept of love in real life.
2. Love and Violence: Terri’s disturbingly persistent belief in Ed’s abusive actions as proof of his love highlights the potential for a twisted connection between love and violence. The story hints that even “real love” can harbor dangerous currents of possessiveness, control, or even outright harm. This challenges idealistic, romantic views of love, suggesting it has a much darker side.
3. The Challenge of Communication: Miscommunication lies at the heart of the narrative. While all the characters speak about love, they seem to mean very different things. Their anecdotes and arguments often miss or contradict each other, showing how difficult it is to articulate personal experiences of love. Their inability to bridge this conversational gap hints at wider struggles with emotional communication and true connection within relationships.
4. Blindness to Others’ Experiences: The story’s characters become locked into their own definitions of love, disregarding or misinterpreting the experiences of others. Terri cannot comprehend why Mel sees Ed as abusive. Mel fails to recognize Terri’s underlying need for her past relationship to be validated as ‘love.’ This blindness to perspectives beyond their own underscores how love, with its deeply personal nature, can make true empathy very difficult.

Writing Style: “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver

Raymond Carver’s “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” is a quintessential example of literary minimalism. His writing is characterized by spare, unadorned language and a focus on surface-level details and dialogue. Sentences are short and direct, with a conversational tone mimicing real-life speech. For example, instead of describing the characters’ emotions, Carver might write, “Mel refilled his glass,” leaving the reader to infer Mel’s state of mind.

This minimalist style creates an emotional distance for the reader. Details of the characters’ appearance or inner thoughts are largely absent. We primarily learn about them through their dialogue, forcing us to decode their words and actions to form our own interpretations about their motivations and beliefs. This lack of authorial guidance mirrors the ambiguity of the story’s central theme – the difficulty of understanding love itself.

Literary Theories and Interpretation of “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver

Literary Theory / Interpretation	Examples from “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love”
Formalism	Analyzing the story’s structure, language, and style.
	Examining Carver’s use of concise dialogue and minimalistic prose to convey complex emotions and relationships.
Marxism	Interpreting the story through the lens of social class and power dynamics.
	Analyzing how the characters’ backgrounds and professions influence their perspectives on love.
Psychoanalytic Criticism	Exploring the characters’ subconscious desires and motivations.
	Investigating the impact of past relationships and traumas on their current behavior and attitudes towards love.
Feminist Theory	Examining the portrayal of gender roles and dynamics in the story.
	Analyzing how female characters like Terri navigate relationships and assert themselves in a male-dominated society.
Reader-Response Criticism	Considering how different readers interpret and respond to the story.
	Exploring how individual experiences and perspectives shape readers’ understanding of love and relationships in the narrative.
Postcolonial Criticism	Investigating the story’s depiction of cultural identity and colonial legacies.
	Analyzing how characters’ cultural backgrounds influence their perceptions and experiences of love.
Deconstruction	Examining the ambiguity and contradictions within the narrative.
	Analyzing how Carver’s use of fragmented storytelling and unresolved conflicts invites multiple interpretations of love.
New Criticism	Focusing solely on the text itself rather than external context or authorial intent.
	Analyzing the story’s symbolism, themes, and literary devices to uncover deeper meanings and interpretations of love.

Topics, Questions and Thesis Statements about “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver

Topics:

1. Perception of Love: Explore how different characters in the story perceive and experience love, ranging from romantic ideals to dysfunctional relationships.
2. Communication and Miscommunication: Analyze the theme of communication (or lack thereof) in the story, focusing on how characters struggle to articulate their feelings and understand one another.
3. Power Dynamics in Relationships: Examine the power dynamics between characters, particularly in romantic relationships, and how they influence the dynamics of love and control.
4. The Fragility of Love: Investigate the fragility and complexity of love portrayed in the story, considering how it can be both sustaining and destructive.

Questions:

1. How do the characters’ diverse experiences and definitions of love contribute to the thematic exploration of the story?
2. In what ways do communication barriers hinder the characters’ ability to connect and understand each other’s perspectives on love?
3. How do power dynamics, such as those between Mel and Terri, shape the characters’ interactions and perceptions of love throughout the narrative?
4. What insights does the story offer about the transient and often fragile nature of love, and how does this contribute to its overall thematic resonance?

Thesis Statements:

1. Through the varied experiences and perspectives of its characters, “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver highlights the multifaceted nature of love and its subjective interpretation.
2. Carver’s exploration of communication breakdowns and misunderstandings underscores the challenges inherent in expressing and comprehending love in human relationships, as seen in “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love.”
3. By examining the power dynamics between characters, particularly in the context of romantic relationships, Carver illuminates how love can be both a source of empowerment and vulnerability in “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love.”
4. Through its portrayal of love’s fragility and impermanence, “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver offers a poignant meditation on the complexities and uncertainties of human relationships.

Short Questions/Answers about “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver

Q1: How does the story’s structure reflect the challenges of discussing love?

A1: Carver’s story lacks a traditional plot structure and is largely driven by dialogue. This meandering conversation, fueled by alcohol, mirrors how discussions of love can feel disjointed and fragmented. The characters interrupt each other, change topics abruptly, and offer anecdotes that seem to lead nowhere. This reflects the difficulty of pinning down a universal definition of love and the frustration that comes with trying to articulate such a complex emotion.

Q2: What’s the significance of Mel McGinnis’s role in the conversation?

A2: Mel, a cardiologist, initially portrays himself as an authority on love. However, his long-winded, sometimes contradictory statements reveal his own insecurities and confusion about the subject. Mel’s attempts to dominate the conversation highlight how ego and the projection of expertise can interfere with true understanding, even when the topic is as universal and personal as love.

Q3: How does Terri’s story about her abusive ex-boyfriend challenge conventional notions of love?

A3: Terri’s insistence that her ex-boyfriend’s violence was a twisted expression of love disrupts idealized views of love as purely positive. Her story forces the characters (and the reader) to confront the uncomfortable reality that love can coexist with harm and destructive patterns. It raises questions about the boundaries of love, the allure of danger, and whether a clear distinction can be made between love and obsession.

Q4: In what ways does the setting contribute to the story’s atmosphere and themes?

A4: The story is set in a domestic kitchen, a seemingly ordinary and intimate space. This contrasts with the escalating emotional intensity of the conversation, suggesting a tension between the mundane and the profound. The continuous supply of gin and the fading sunlight create a sense of timelessness, hinting that this conversation about love, with its confusions and anxieties, is both universal and cyclical.

Literary Works Similar to “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver

1. “Dubliners” by James Joyce: This collection of short stories delves into the lives of ordinary Dubliners and their struggles with love, identity, and society, echoing Carver’s focus on everyday characters and their complex inner lives.
2. “Interpreter of Maladies” by Jhumpa Lahiri: Like Carver’s stories, Lahiri’s collection examines the intricacies of human relationships, often highlighting moments of misunderstanding, longing, and connection among characters.
3. “A Visit from the Goon Squad” by Jennifer Egan: Egan’s novel weaves together interconnected stories that explore themes of love, time, and memory, offering a kaleidoscopic view of modern life and relationships.
4. “Olive Kitteridge” by Elizabeth Strout: Similar to Carver’s focus on ordinary people in small-town America, Strout’s novel-in-stories delves into the lives of residents in a coastal Maine town, exploring themes of love, loss, and resilience.
5. “Birds of America” by Lorrie Moore: Moore’s collection of short stories examines the complexities of contemporary relationships with wit, humor, and poignancy, resonating with Carver’s exploration of human emotions and experiences.

Suggested Readings about/on “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” by Raymond Carver

Peer-Reviewed Journal Articles:

• Broyard, Anatole. “Books of The Times.” The New York Times, 15 Apr. 1981, https://archive.nytimes.com/www.nytimes.com/books/01/01/21/specials/carver-what.html.
  • While not a traditional scholarly article, Meyer’s piece provides critical insight into the reception of Carver’s short story collection and its influence on contemporary writers.

Book Chapters:

• Gentry, Marshall Bruce, and William L. Stull. “Raymond Carver.” Conversations with Raymond Carver, edited by Marshall Bruce Gentry and William L. Stull, University Press of Mississippi, 1990, pp. 140-151.
  • This chapter provides direct commentary from Carver about his minimalist style, choices in “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love”, and its place within his larger body of work.
• Nesset, Kirk. “The Stories of Raymond Carver: A Critical Study.” Ohio University Press, 1995.
  • This book offers a comprehensive analysis of Carver’s works. Find the chapter dedicated to “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” for in-depth analysis and discussions on the story’s themes.

Websites

1. Gordon, Mary. “The Art of Raymond Carver.” The New York Review of Books, 24 June 1982, https://www.nybooks.com/articles/1982/06/24/the-art-of-raymond-carver/.
2. “Raymond Carver.” Poetry Foundation, https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poets/raymond-carver.